Ian's Blog

  1. The Culture of Silence: Why We Avoid the Hard Conversations Silence is not always the absence of sound — it is often the deliberate muting of truth. In families, silence surrounds abuse. In churches, silence surrounds hypocrisy. In society, silence surrounds injustice. What binds these silences together is the belief that keeping quiet is safer than exposing what hurts. Families tell victims of abuse, “Don’t bring shame to the family.” Churches warn congregants, “Do not question the man of God.” Governments silence protestors with the narrative that raising your voice threatens “peace and order.” The result? Pain festers, truth is buried, and entire generations inherit wounds that no one dared to name. At the heart of this silence lies fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of retaliation. Fear of being seen differently. But beneath the fear also lies convenience — because silence benefits those in power. If the child remains silent about the uncle who abused her, the family mainta...

I came across a story on the internet that shook me. A young man, not yet 30, was doing well by every standard we know. He had built his parents a home. He was driving his own car. He was earning a six-figure salary. He was even building his dream four-bedroom house. On the surface, it was the kind of life many of us pray for. But just as he was about to finish his house, tragedy struck. He passed away. It’s the kind of story that stops you in your tracks because it holds up a mirror to the fragility of life. Here was someone doing everything “right.” He was responsible, hardworking, loving to his parents, planning for his future. And yet, unpredictability cut his story short. Life’s Unpredictability is Painful We often comfort ourselves by thinking that if we work hard, plan well, and live responsibly, things will go smoothly. But life is rarely so predictable. We are not promised tomorrow. The people we laugh with today may be gone tomorrow. The projects we begin with so much ene...

  Part 1: The Butcher’s Trick   The story is simple. A man changes his butcher. The old butcher closes shop, and a new one takes his place. But this new butcher plays games with the weighing scale, charging more for less meat, slipping in bones instead of beef, and passing it off as clever business. The customer leaves. He switches to buying meat from the supermarket, where prices are fixed and scales are regulated. Life becomes peaceful again. This small, everyday act captures something far deeper about the Kenyan condition. In this country, we’ve glorified ujanja —a culture of cleverness, trickery, and shortcuts. It is not brilliance in the true sense. It is not innovation or genius. It is simply dishonesty, packaged as street-smartness. When Kenyans describe someone as mjuaji or mjanja , they don’t usually mean he is wise or disciplined. They mean he knows how to bend the rules, how to cut corners, how to win by outwitting others—even if that “win” leaves others poorer,...

  The Paradox of Empowerment Through Nudity We live in an age where women are told that empowerment is synonymous with exposure. Flip through glossy magazines, scroll through social media feeds, or tune into popular music videos, and a clear pattern emerges: the narrative of women’s strength is often wrapped in skin. Fashion campaigns insist that baring it all is bold. Body positivity slogans shout that undressing is the highest form of self-love. Even movements meant to break free from patriarchal structures sometimes end up circling back to the same formula—women proving liberation through visibility of their bodies. But here lies a paradox. While nudity can indeed be an expression of freedom, why is it so consistently marketed as the pathway to empowerment? And more crucially, who benefits most from this framing? The women themselves, or the industries profiting off their exposure? This question is not new. Decades ago, the rise of Playboy during the so-called “sexual revolut...

A New Form of Cancel Culture When we hear the term cancel culture , we often picture social media mobs, celebrities under fire, or politicians losing platforms. It’s about being publicly shamed, excluded, or written off because of mistakes, missteps, or unpopular views. But there’s another form of cancel culture—quieter, less talked about, yet just as destructive—that has taken root inside the church. This one doesn’t trend on Twitter or make global headlines, but it leaves scars on souls. In Christian spaces, cancel culture looks like judgment replacing grace. It looks like congregations that build walls higher than they build bridges. It looks like communities where mistakes aren’t met with compassion, but with exile. In fact, many Christians have perfected the art of being Lords —not Lord as Christ, but little lords of their own domains of purity. They patrol the borders of righteousness, eager to point out who is “in” and who is “out,” who is worthy and who is condemned. Instead...

Fatherhood is one of the most profound roles a man can step into. It is a journey marked not only by responsibility but by the potential to shape another human life. Yet for many men today, stepping into fatherhood feels like stumbling into uncharted territory without a compass. They are expected to build homes they themselves never lived in, to model love they never saw expressed, and to lead children through storms they were never guided through. They are fathers without blueprints. The absence of present, nurturing fathers across generations has created a void that many men carry silently into adulthood. This is not merely about absenteeism in the physical sense, but about fathers who were emotionally unavailable, harsh, dismissive, or preoccupied with survival in systems that ground them down. In such circumstances, boys grew into men without seeing what tenderness from a father looks like, without learning what patient correction sounds like, and without witnessing a man balance ...

There is a quiet truth that rarely finds its way into the motivational speeches and success seminars of our time: a satisfied life will always outweigh a successful one. Success is judged through the eyes of others, but satisfaction is measured in the silence of your own soul. Success is applause from outside; satisfaction is harmony from within. One fades when the crowd goes silent, the other remains with you long after the lights go out. You don’t need the world to approve of you — you need only to rest at night, content with the life you are living. The Mirage of Success From the time we are children, the world teaches us to equate life’s worth with achievement. We are told to strive, to compete, to collect trophies, titles, and possessions. The successful life, as defined by society, is one adorned with external markers: the house in a prestigious neighborhood, the car with the polished badge, the job title that commands respect, the bank balance that elicits envy. But here is t...