Ian's Blog

  A recent encounter with a man undergoing physiotherapy in a hospital left me profoundly moved and reflective about the essence of family and the importance of fostering a warm home culture. This man, paralyzed from the waist down for several months, shared his insights on family dynamics, revealing how the love and presence of his children provided him with immense strength and comfort during his challenging times. His story illuminated the critical difference between material support and emotional presence, showing the value of nurturing close-knit family bonds. While accompanying my father to a routine checkup, I struck up a conversation with this man, who expressed admiration for my decision to personally bring my dad to the hospital. He commented on how this act mirrored the actions of his own children, who had been by his side throughout his ordeal. This man’s resilience, despite his physical limitations, were based in the loving environment he had cultivated within his fami...

As I listened to Robert Waldinger's TED Talk, "What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness," I found myself deeply reflecting on the essential ingredients of a fulfilling life. Waldinger, a psychiatrist and director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, presents findings from a 75-year-long study on what truly brings happiness and well-being. The insights he shared profoundly resonated with me and illuminated the path to a good life with clarity and simplicity. Here, I share my personal reflections and interpretations based on Waldinger's compelling talk. One of the most striking revelations from Waldinger's talk is the paramount importance of relationships. It's not wealth, fame, or hard work that makes us happy and healthy; it’s the quality of our relationships. This insight challenges many modern assumptions about success and happiness. I often find myself caught up in the hustle and bustle of life, believing that more achieveme...

In today's world, the pursuit of happiness is often conflated with the pursuit of material wealth and social status. Many people spend their lives in a relentless race, chasing after the bag/money, possessions, and recognition. However, those who have lived long enough and gained wisdom from their experiences often highlight a different path to a fulfilling life: contentment . The essence of contentment is not about having plenty, but about appreciating and finding joy in what one already has. It is this mindset that truly levels the playing field and brings real pleasure and satisfaction in life. The Fallacy of the Rat Race Modern society tends to glorify the hustle, pushing the idea that happiness is directly proportional to one’s wealth and achievements. The media and popular culture often reinforce this narrative, creating a perpetual sense of inadequacy and competition. People are led to believe that more money, a bigger house, a more prestigious job, or a more attractive part...

The dynamics of attraction have long been a subject of debate, and one enduring theory posits that women prefer experienced men while men are drawn to inexperienced women. This perspective, rooted in traditional gender roles, suggests that men's attractiveness is heightened by their experience and confidence, while women's allure is tied to their innocence and purity. But how true is this theory in modern relationships? The Appeal of Experienced Men Experience in men is often synonymous with confidence, competence, and leadership—qualities that are highly attractive to many women. An experienced man, in life and in bed, is seen as someone who can provide stability and guidance. This is not merely about sexual prowess; it extends to life skills, decision-making, and emotional intelligence. Experience breeds confidence. A man who has navigated various life challenges tends to be more self-assured. This confidence can be magnetic, as it often translates into a sense of security fo...

  Dear reader, imagine for a moment that the veil of night was lifted and the world was bathed in perpetual daylight. Every shadowy corner and hidden recess exposed to the unflinching light. Would people scatter at what they see in you, or would they stand firm, unafraid of the revelations that daylight brings? This thought experiment invites you to reflect on the secrets you keep and the personas we project. Each of you harbors thoughts, actions, and desires we keep in the dark. But what if those secrets were suddenly brought into the open? Would the world see you differently? More importantly, would you see yourself differently? The Masks We Wear We all wear masks. Some are worn to protect ourselves, others to fit in, and still others to hide our vulnerabilities. But these masks can become burdensome. They can disconnect us from our true selves and from those around us. In the relentless pursuit of acceptance and approval, we often suppress our authentic selves. But at what cost?...

In many African homes, sex remains a taboo topic, shrouded in silence and often avoided at all costs. This cultural reluctance to discuss sex openly has profound implications for our young adults, who often navigate their early sexual experiences with little to no guidance. As someone who grew up with minimal sexual education and has seen the consequences firsthand among my peers, I firmly believe the time has come for parents to end the silence and take an active role in educating their children about sex. The transition from adolescence to adulthood is a critical period marked by significant physical, emotional, and psychological changes. For many, this transition includes their first sexual experiences. Unfortunately, without proper guidance, these experiences can lead to mistakes with lasting consequences, such as teenage pregnancies, single parenthood, sexually transmitted infections (STIs), and emotional trauma from unhealthy relationships. Teaching and sharing about sexual and r...

  The transition from adolescence to adulthood is a complex and often lonely journey. Despite being surrounded by family and friends, many young people feel isolated as they navigate the tumultuous changes that come with growing up. This period is marked by self-discovery, decision-making, and a new understanding of their parents and their struggles. It is also a time when many young individuals strive to break free from cultural constraints they have never enjoyed. Understanding these dynamics can help bridge the gap between young people and their support systems, fostering a more supportive environment for this crucial transition. Struggling for Autonomy Adolescence is often described as a period of "growing but not yet grown." Adolescents are acutely aware of their emerging independence and strong feelings, yet they are frequently denied the freedom to make certain decisions. A supportive home environment and positive friendships can make this period more enjoyable. Howeve...

  Suicide is a topic that evokes strong emotions and opinions. It's a subject often shrouded in misunderstanding and judgment. Some view it as a selfish act, while others perceive it as a desperate plea for relief from unimaginable pain. As I consider these conflicting perspectives, I'm compelled to better understand the complexities surrounding suicide. The notion of suicide as a selfish act is one that is frequently debated. At first glance, it's easy to condemn the individual who chooses to end their own life, viewing their actions as a betrayal to those left behind. But is it fair to cast such harsh judgment without fully comprehending the torment that led them to that point? This is where the distinction between perception and reality becomes crucial. When contemplating suicide, questions inevitably arise: Who is next? Can suicide really be prevented? What does it mean for me that someone died by their own hand? Could I be affected by the same self-destructive thoughts...

The dance between floods and droughts is a harsh reality that we face with increasing frequency. As torrents of rain inundate our lands, threatening lives, livelihoods, and food security, the looming specter of drought waits patiently in the wings, poised to wreak havoc on our communities. It's a delicate balancing act that demands urgent attention and proactive solutions. At this very moment, as floods ravage our nation, our response must be swift and comprehensive. Emergency measures, including evacuation plans and relief aid distribution, are imperative to safeguard lives and alleviate suffering. Early warning systems, coupled with community preparedness, can mitigate the worst impacts of flooding, reducing loss of life and property. Yet, as we scramble to address the immediate crisis, we must also cast our gaze towards the future. The excess water that now engulfs our nation presents a valuable opportunity. We stand at a crossroads where we can choose to harness this abundance ...